horse-pony13

I never meant to get in this deep I never thought I would get this attached To an inanimate slit A ruby rain drop The high feeling When I'm so low

I don't ask for much Only a few essentials Things I cannot live without I don't require everything Just a handful of items Despite the materialistic world I just want solitude Maybe a couple friends Who I can trust Who will never leave Like you did. I just want happiness Genuine smiles for a change A thin stomach My horse underneath me Nothing will go wrong again. But it's too much to desire My mind explains As everything is ripped away Everything indispensable to me Blew away with my sanity.

A bright dazzling smile Always sitting on her pretty face Perfect brown hair Always precisely straightened Flows down her back Best clothes Cutest shoes A+'s on every test Everyone whispers how Absolutely perfect she is How they should be like her She's convinced They're tearing her to shreds Skipping lunch Skipping dinner Shining eyes dim The smile remains Every night Another notch in pale skin Marks another day She's been too strong

"I'm fine" an opaque phrase covering so many wounds so many punctures those two words can ruin a person by making them too strong

who said self harm only comes in the shape of a knife pressed cleanly against marked skin drawing a perfect line on a flawed body who said anorexia is a disease only for those dangerously thin paper skin over thick protruding bones who said depression only affects the dark girl crying in the corner clothes as black as her mind self harm can come from the mind constantly bullying picking out every fucking flaw unable to be outrun anorexia could be the girl pudgy but thinning sunken eyes measuring everything eating food with eyes instead of the mouth depression lives inside the happy exterior of a friendly smi

You don't know How strong you must be To want to kill yourself on the inside Then put a fake smile on Laughing and talking Like nothing is wrong You can't comprehend How much you must hate yourself To slice open your wrist Every night Praying to God You won't wake up in the morning You don't understand How hard you must be on yourself To starve for days on end Drinking water Flexing your stomach Trying to keep it from grumbling You don't fathom How guilty you must feel To binge on thousands of calories Then pull them all out Flushing them into the toilet Only to do it again tomorrow You will never realize How mu

They put me on display Like a python in a case Majestically trapped behind failure Refusing to put on a show Still being watched They poke and prod To see if they can provoke a movement All I give them Is silence. The hold me up Like a lion in a zoo Free but trapped Keep running until the leash is snapped People marvel in wonder They poke and prod To see if they can provoke my teeth All I give them Is silence. They abuse me Like an elephant in a circus Stabbing with a hook If I fail to bow to their wishes Putting on a great show Makeup to cover the wounds They poke and prod To see if they can provoke my

My words betrayed me. My thoughts killed me. My heart destroyed me. You saved me.

I wonder Why Society judges And we wait Silently Patiently For the executioners Ax